you’re not bad at friendships. you were never taught how

It's been a long time since I did one of these walking videos and I'm kind of excited for it. But I moved to Tokyo. Right now I'm in Tokyo and I'm moving on the streets of Tokyo. It's kind of a very quiet place um in Shinagal.

And I wanted to talk about loneliness and how that can show up in different situations. And for me specifically this time like this choice of moving to Tokyo. There's two things that basically happened to me because I moved here. one my boyfriend which has been my long-term relationship for like 1 year and a half but he's in India right now so we're not together and then I also moved here but without really knowing many people so most of my friends did not come with me and then I have some acquaintances but I wouldn't say I have any close relationship with me here so given this um I think I've been struggling for the past week week and a half since I got here to basically in this kind of very lonely city because Tokyo is quite a lonely city to find motivation or time to spend with new people or like try to get close friends.

And honestly, I wanted to talk about how in your 20s or like in your 30s or when you grow older and you're not a child anymore, you kind of stop having this motivation of meeting new people and especially if you know you have found new people before. So for example, so I did find my boyfriend which I consider my best friend and I know I have him and I know like I have like this close person that I can always call and talk to and I also know I have other very close friends that I can just call and talk anytime I want. And because of this I don't really have any motivation to meet new people to connect with new people to even give them a chance to become my close friends. And this is quite sad because I feel like when you're young or like when you have this fear of being alone, this fear of loneliness, this motivation to always be surrounded by people, that desire, that very strong emotion that you have when you're young is so important for making friends, for making con, for making any like just connecting with human beings because I feel like after you have found those people that just goes away almost completely and the only thing that stays is the sadness of you not having any close friends around you.

And I think this is not really talked about enough. I mean, we always kind of complain that when we get to adulthood, we kind of stop making friends and we kind of also stop thinking about friends that much or like just like we just keep to the people that we found a while ago, which is fair and normal. But at the same time, it is sad that we don't have this motivation anymore. And without this motivation, it's very hard for us to even get ourselves to new people or like just talk to strangers, give strangers a chance to be our close friends.

I like talking about this idea because I feel like it's I wouldn't say taboo, but like I feel like at some point in our lives, we all experience it. Something new that you're doing. And if you were like in your teens or when you were younger when you were a child, you would have the first time you get there, you would have had this extreme fear and intense emotion of oh let's find friends. Let's connect with people.

Let's just I don't know find people that will surround us. And I don't know if that's because we wanted friends or that's if that's because we wanted to not be seen as alone. Because now that the fear of being alone or like being seen as alone is not present anymore, we don't really have that desire of meeting new people. So maybe it wasn't about connecting with people at all.

Maybe it was just about kind of not being seen as we're not connecting with people. And I'm wondering if we can turn that motivation, that social acceptance, fear into like if we can transform that into the motivation of connecting with new people in any way. And I think that's what I'm kind of trying to experiment with right now. Because if you think that you're only going to spend time with the people that you're currently spending time with, every single person that comes into your life from now on is going to be, I don't know, wasted potential or like a potential that you're not even seeing.

Which overall, I think it's sad. And I think it's quite sad to live life like this. I think getting to be aware of this thing and especially when it's happening because I feel like we're aware of the sadness that we're lonely because we still feel lonely as adults but we just don't have the motivation of meeting new people which means we're only feeling that sadness but we're not really taking any action towards it or even if we do take the action it's usually a short-term thing like calling a friend or meeting someone for coffee and then not talking to them again or at least that's the case for like maybe not extroverts but I feel Like introverts do struggle with this a lot and I struggle with it so much. I think we should start being more aware of this and we should start realizing that we are not the only people that are actually experiencing this.

I think most people our age experience this to some extent and I feel like we should be talking about it and we should put ourselves through some challenges of looking at people and seeing the potential that we used to see in them as if we were young. just looking at people and seeing them as a companion without us even talking to them initially and having this I wouldn't say childlike mind because I don't really like to think about that because it's I feel like it's just the fear of not being seen to be alone but just this curiosity about the person and every time we get out of the house every time we see something new or go to some place new see a stranger on the street we could try to find one thing that we find interesting about that person one thing that we won't want you know, learn more about them. And I feel like training this curiosity and training this sense of sense of asking questions and wanting the answers for those questions will set us as the human race farther than we are right now and more, I guess, less lonely compared to how we're feeling right now. Because I feel like most adults, and I don't consider myself an adult because I'm just 21, but I see this happening to me.

I see myself turning into an adult. And with that there's also loneliness. And I think that said, if that's how it's being right now, it doesn't mean that we have to continue living like this in the future, too. Thank you for watching.

And if you like this video, I hope you like this one, too. Love you guys. Have the best of your life. Kisses.

Bye-bye.