the glossary · word
what does varioriented mean?
varioriented · also called cross-oriented
Varioriented, also called cross-oriented, describes someone whose romantic and sexual orientations point in different directions. Biromantic and heterosexual, for instance. Or homoromantic and asexual. It is a community term from the split attraction model, and it exists because the standard labels quietly assume the two always match. When they don't, people end up saying something clumsy like 'I'm straight, but I only ever fall in love with women', and then feeling like they invented it on the spot. They didn't. There is a word, it is ordinary, and enough people are it that one was needed.
where it comes from: Split attraction model ↗
this one has a whole chapter under it. read: which orientation combination are you? →
what to read on this
- Ace Angela Chen what the ace spectrum shows everyone about desire, not just ace people. the clearest writing anywhere on compulsory sexuality. the vantage point most of my videos are written from.
- The Invisible Orientation Julie Sondra Decker the introduction. the whole spectrum of words in one place, demisexual and gray-a included, written for someone who has just found the term.
amazon affiliate links. buying through one costs you nothing extra and keeps this page free. every book i recommend →
also asked
can you be romantically and sexually attracted to different genders?
Yes. That is exactly what varioriented describes, and it is far more common than the single-label system suggests. The two orientations are separate systems, so there is no rule requiring them to aim at the same people.
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sits next to
- split-attraction model The idea that romantic and sexual attraction are distinct and can point in different directions, the backbone of the whole field guide.
- perioriented When your romantic and sexual orientations line up, aimed at the same people. Most people are perioriented, which is why they rarely notice the two are separate systems.