a field card · ria · riadms.com
the seven kinds of attraction
the words for what you’re feeling. most people are handed names for three of these. the other four don’t disappear, they just go unnamed. here they all are.
- sexual wanting sexual contact. one of seven, not the main event.
- romantic wanting to build a life with someone.
- aesthetic you find them beautiful and you want to do nothing about it.
- sensual wanting to be held with no interest in where it leads.
- intellectual you want their mind, not their life.
- platonic the friend crush. everyone has them. nobody names them.
- alterous closer than a friend, not a crush, no word for it until now.
from me for years i only had two of these words, sexual and romantic, and i kept forcing every feeling i had into one of them. naming the other five is the thing that changed how i love people. so before you file this away: which two were you handed, and which of the rest have you actually been feeling?
your turn
which one have you been feeling for someone, but never had the word for? write it, and who it is.
pick one person in your life. of these seven, what do you actually want from them?